Month: July 2022

Notes to my Grandchildren 5

What is one of your favorite trips you have taken? What made it great?

As a young child, I wasn’t always the most adventuresome.  I was often reminded by family I sat at the bottom of the Washington Monument and the Empire State Building with my mother, while my dad and sister made the journey and memory of seeing the world from those great heights. Granted, I was only 5 and Sarah was 8 at the time, but as I grew older I always had a feeling of missing out on a great adventure!

It’s hard to say at what point in my life I decided to never sit at the bottom and hear other people talk about their adventures.  I am not saying I decided to become the next great explorer, but I did decide to take advantage of every opportunity to explore and to make my world as big as possible.

At the end of the summer before I started college, my future brother in law rallied a group of guys from the church in which he was working as youth pastor to hike 5 days on the Appalachian Trail in the Great Smokey Mountains. I had always loved being outdoors and our family had done a little Camping (more like Glamping) so this sounded like something I would enjoy.  Living in Florida, the North Carolina Mountains seemed like a whole new world for me and I was excited about the opportunity.  

The trip was a major influence in my life.  It was harder than I expected and exposed some weaknesses in my fitness level and how much I relied on modern technology (this was 1971 so what I missed was Air Conditioning, a mattress, clean drinking water, a refrigerator, etc.).  After completing the hike, many of my attitudes would start to change.  I began to treasure God’s creation even more.  I valued modern technology, but also valued the ability to live without technology.  It was good to live out of a back pack for a few days.  It was good to sleep in a sleeping bag, in a tent, on the ground.

Over the course of my life, I would make about 20 hikes and covered close to 800 miles of Appalachian Trail.  On several occasions I considered going off on my own and trying to hike large sections of the trail by myself.  It just never was appealing.  I realized what I valued most was the people with whom I was sharing the journey.

My brother in law, your Uncle Rob, would create a ministry which would hosts several hundred people a year and introduce them to the hiking experience.  Through Wilderness Trail, he provided primarily youth and young adults an opportunity to grow in their love of God by experiencing God’s Creation and even more important to grow each person’s love of others as they shared the journey together.

A key scripture which has guided Wilderness Trail and my life is Galatians 6: ² Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.  

One of the reasons I am writing these notes for you is to help equip you for life’s journey.

Don’t miss the opportunities which are presented to you.  Push yourself to climb to the top!  If you need to rest, stop for a moment, but give it your all.

Value the people with whom you are traveling.  As I look back at my life, I am so amazed and grateful I was given the opportunity to travel all over the world. I have stayed in tents and I have stayed in all inclusive resorts.  I don’t have enough time to describe all those experiences. Memories and people matter the most.  They are the most important!

Below is the logo for Wilderness Trail.  It illustrates Galatians 6:2.

What is one of your fondest childhood memories?

It took me a few moments to decide my fondest memory.  Partly, because I have so many!  I don’t mean to say that boastfully, but in a world where people are abused and neglected at such an early age I really can only dwell on the wonderful family and friends I had as a child!  This may not be my fondest memory! It is, however, one that has stayed with me through the years.  It is one of those events that even when it happens you appreciate it, and as you grow older it becomes even fonder!

My generation was taught to write in cursive in the third grade.  I struggled all year long to master the art of cursive.  Every other subject I made A’s and B’s without a lot of struggles.  Penmanship, however, was at best a C.  

All year long I struggled to improve, but C was the best I could do.  Fortunately, I had a very kind and gifted teacher, Miss Guinand!  I think it was her first-year teaching.  She was young and enthusiastic. Also, she was the first teacher I had that didn’t look and act like my mother or grandmother.  I confess, she was my first crush.  I remember daydreaming about how beautiful and sweet she was and hoped she wait for me to grow up and marry me.  She cared about all of her students and through the year she noticed my efforts and gave me some extra help to improve. On my last report card for the year, she gave me an A in penmanship!  Notice, I said she GAVE.  I knew I didn’t deserve it!  

It would be almost 20 years later, as I began to learn about how God’s Grace is shown to us in Jesus Christ. Paul writes in Ephesians 2:  8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God. The A in penmanship was gift!  I didn’t deserve or earn it.  At best she gave it to me because I put in the effort, but it was mostly because she cared about me.  She cared about her students.  I think she actually loved us!  
That’s how God’s love works!   We don’t deserve it!  We can’t earn it!  It is a gift!  That gift, however, was paid for by Jesus Christ!  It cost Him his life!

My fond memory of Miss Guinand’s act of Grace has been repeated over and over by family and friends.  I have lived in a state of Grace.  As a recipient of Grace, I have tried to show Grace and unconditional love to people with whom I am in contact!  You are surrounded by that Grace as well.  Your family and friends are motivated by the Grace of God they have experienced in Jesus Christ!  Live in it!  Share it!

To this day, my handwriting would best be described as sloppy.  There is something in my brain that tends to get ahead of my hands, and I am just not able to concentrate on what I am writing and how to write it at the same time.  (I am very grateful for word processors!)  I seriously doubt there will be any improvement during your lifetime.  There will be cards and notes I will write to you and if you find them hard to decipher, please know that they were written to tell you how much I love you!  I love you not for what you have or haven’t done, but just because you are my grandchild!

The world needs more people like Miss Guinand!  You need people like her!  My prayer is that you will follow her example.  Actually, my deepest prayer is that you will know the Grace of God displayed through the life, the death and the resurrection of God’s Son, Jesus of Nazareth.  The savior of the world!  Only by His Grace can you know abundant life!

As you get older, always remember and celebrate the people who have shown you Grace and unconditional love!

Have you pulled any great pranks?

When it comes to pranks, I don’t have any really great ones! Quite frankly, pranks are a slippery slope. They often backfire and people can get really embarrassed and even physically hurt. I would like to tell you that I was always sensitive to this, but I am afraid I probably did some damage with the pranks I played. Fortunately, I have repressed the memories of the pranks that have been done to me, but I am sure I have emotional trauma that possibly cripples me at times!
Probably the prank that I pulled the most was hiding in the shadows or behind a corner and waiting for your grandmother to come around the corner and jumping out at her or hollering BOO to see if I could scare her. Even that lost its luster after one memorable occasion. Shortly after we were married, we lived in an apartment that had a separate laundry room. By the time you are old enough to read and understand these notes, you will probably have learned that I have an obsession with keeping cars, houses, etc locked. Your grandmother does not share that obsession. One night as she was doing the laundry, I had heard on the news that there had been a lot of burglaries in our areas and reminded her to keep the door locked. I went on an errand and when I returned the apartment was empty and the door was unlocked. I remembered she was going to do some laundry. Not too long after that I could hear her coming up our entrance stairs. So, I ran down the hallway and hid behind a nook. As she walked down the hall, she passed me, and I reached my hand around her mouth and grabbed her shoulder. I am not sure whether I remembered my warning about the burglaries, But She Did. She fell to the ground and began to cry and for about 5 minutes she could hardly breathe and all I could say repeatedly was, “I am sorry!!!!! The good news is our marriage survived!

During our years doing youth ministry, we used an assortment of crowd breakers to create a fun atmosphere. Games, skits, and funny songs were used to help create a fun atmosphere. There was one prank we used quite often. We would choose 4 or 5 volunteers who would have to leave the room while we set up a table of several balls. Each ball was covered by a large napkin or towel and the volunteer would be brought back in the room and told they would be timed to see how fast they could uncover and identify the ball. Each would come back with great enthusiasm they would start to uncover the ball and shout out the type. As a part of the prank of the prank, the last ball was actually a carefully chosen person sitting under two tables with their head sticking up, covered by a towel. We usually picked the youth pastor or the most popular male adult counselor. When the towel was removed, they were instructed to scream at the top of their lungs. (There must be something wrong with me that takes so much joy in scaring people.) The reactions were always pretty funny.

There was, however, a twist! The person under the table usually enjoyed the process of surprising their friends. The last person who came in was told about the last ball being a person. They were given a plate full of whip cream and when they pulled the towel off the head, they would push the plate into the face of the screaming prankster. There was a moment of justice when the prankster was pranked!

It’s important for you to know that there are some criteria that you should follow if you are going to pull a prank. Don’t use pranks vindictively. Don’t pick on the weak. If you are going to prank someone, find someone who has a lot of confidence and can take a joke! Not always easy to know this for sure. Be careful pulling pranks. You will understand this better after you have been pranked. Ask yourself how you would feel having this done to you!

Still, after all that, be careful. Even the strong and popular are easily embarrassed, and no prank is worth hurting someone’s feeling. I used this prank on a young man that I had known and who I knew was very popular in his youth group. He seemed like the perfect choice. He was great at scaring the people, but when he received the pie in the face, I could tell immediately the prank went a little wrong. He was very meticulous in his grooming and might have even been wearing a brand-new shirt. At that moment, I felt terrible and did my best to apologize. Fortunately, he rallied, but that prank was never as much fun! Let me reiterate, BE CAREFUL WHO YOU PRANK!

Also, if you are going to be a prankster, be ready to be pranked. In life we quite often reap what we sow!

Chances are one day you are going to be pranked. Here’s a little advice.
Maybe you were picked because you are strong and popular. Enjoy the notoriety. If you were picked for vindictive reasons, shake it off! Be strong! I hope you never have to go through this, but you will learn to be a lot more sensitive to the world of people who are victimized and hopefully you will become a champion for those who are picked on, made fun of, alienated and persecuted!

One of my favorite paintings is Jesus laughing! My mother gave it to me when I was in High School. I think she wanted me to know that Jesus had a sense of humor and enjoyed life to the fullest. Another thing she taught me about Jesus comes from Him: Luke 6:31New International Version 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you. Here’s my point, don’t ever pull a prank on a person that you wouldn’t want pulled on you! Learn to laugh at yourself and not take yourself too seriously.

Here’s the good news! That young man that I pranked, is our good friend Wade Thigpen. Somehow, he found enough inner strength to forgive me and we are as close as family, FRAMILY as they say! His daughter Charlotte loves you like younger siblings. That’s no prank!