Month: December 2022

    This note could fill several chapters.  It may be the most important note so far.  Acquiring and using wisdom has served me well over the years and I am blessed to have many people who displayed wisdom and helped me find and follow the path of wisdom.  I will be sharing about several people who influenced me, but before I do, I will want to share some about Wisdom in general.

    Knowledge and Wisdom are closely related, but also different.  In life you may meet people who have a lot of knowledge, but they lack wisdom.  Conversely, people with wisdom may not always have the most acquired knowledge.  As you grow, my prayer for you is to acquire both, but above all grow in wisdom.  Knowledge will not make you wise, but wisdom will almost always help you with whatever knowledge you have. 

    Here’s a simple example.  A person may be knowledgeable about the speed limit, but a wise person follows it.  A person may know they shouldn’t jump off the roof and try to defy gravity; a wise person makes the decision to refrain.  It is good to find a balance between them.

    Fortunately, both of my parents taught and modeled Wisdom for me.  In my last note I covered a lot of how they helped me, so I will share about some others.

    The pastor in charge of the youth for most of my middle and high school days was Jack Taylor.  Jack had the kind of wisdom which valued people and saw and developed the potential in those around him, especially those under his care.  After he left my church, he served the church where Sassy and her family were members.  He had a great impact on her life as well, was instrumental in us meeting and would perform our wedding ceremony.  In the early years of ministry, I served on the staff of Lakewood UMC with him as the Lead Pastor.  Jack is what I might call the Pied Piper Leader.  He made everything look fun, even if it wasn’t.  People wanted to be on his team.  He trusted you with responsibility and if you failed he still had your back.  I have said about Jack “he gave you enough rope to hang yourself, but he was there to rescue you.  If you made a swing out of the rope, he was there on the ground applauding your efforts.”  People with wisdom like Jack are important influences in your life and I pray there will be many in your life.

   During my first years at Florida Southern College, the chaplain was Tom Price.  Tom was an amazing human being!  He was the lead communicator for the Sunday Chapel Service and also taught Old and New Testament which were required in those days.  Students often felt forced to take these Bible courses, but Tom made it worth it.  He had the ability to unravel the historical complexities of Biblical Stories and provide a clear interpretation and application for these stories.  Above all else, he was kind!  His wife Nancy and his family were very instrumental in my hearing and accepting a call into the ministry.  After teaching for a year and a half, I had benefited from the experience, but had never really considered teaching as a life time career.   While I grew more restless about my future, Tom called and asked if would join him in ministry at a UM Church in Haines City, Florida.  During college I had worked a couple of summers as a youth director at my home church in Orlando and had worked part time one semester at a church in Lakeland.  It had been several years since I had been connected with the church and my faith in Jesus was a very low priority.  There was, however, something which resonated in my heart this would be a good thing.  Tom, Nancy and the whole church embraced me and during the year I rediscovered my personal faith in Jesus as Savior and began to give Him the Lordship of my life.  After about 9 months I felt a call to the ministry.  When I shared it with Tom, he said he always saw the potential I had to be a minister and part of the reason he had asked me to join him was to help me embrace my God given potential and align again with God’s direction.  Tom had great wisdom and many of the people associated with Tom were influenced by his discernment and ability to help people become who God intended them to be.  I would like to think I acquired some of his wisdom.

 While in seminary, Sassy and I became friends with Alison and Mark Rutland.  Mark was a UM pastor about 6 years older than me.  He was launching out into a new ministry beyond the local church.  God had given Mark a pretty full dose of the Holy Spirit and he had an amazing way of explaining the power of God which comes through the resurrected Jesus Christ.  I could relate to Mark.  We were both products of the church, but it often lacked in the power of the Holy Spirit.  The other extreme of churches expressing the power of the Holy Spirit often seemed a bit strange and sometimes there were abuses.  Mark, however, seemed to be right in the middle and was able to hold those two extremes together.  It was what I needed.  Mark invited us to join him in his Evangelistic Ministry.  As I started Seminary I began to wonder what role my musical gifts would play.  It seemed maybe it was time to leave it in my past.  It seemed logical to close those chapters and move on and to adapt to the normal role of minister.  God had a plan for us that would include our musical gifts and Mark was the primary influence in encouraging and facilitating those gifts.  Mark was one of those fearless types of people who I always admired but never quite saw myself in that way.  To put it simply, Mark filled my courage tank with faith!  He had the type of Wisdom able to see beyond the present moment.  He helped everyone feel less fearful and more courageous.  To be honest Mark would have been successful in any field, but it was the empowerment of the Holy Spirit which set him apart from people who aspire to success only.  I am writing this on December 24, 2022.  Yesterday I got a text from Mark.  Just telling us we are on his heart.  It was a pretty great gift. 

   Your great grandfather Glen Keys (Harper, you have his middle name) is the epitome of Wise.  He never finished High School or attended college.  I don’t think he ever had a lot of regrets, but I am sure he would encourage you to get as much education as possible.  He was a true entrepreneur!  He had the kind of wisdom you don’t get in college.  In the years I knew him, I consulted him on almost every minor and major decision of my life.  Papa had an abundance of common sense wisdom.  Though he didn’t pursue classroom education he taught himself to do a lot of things.  If it has wheels on it he knew how to drive it.  He loved being on the water and he was pretty good at navigating.  He had his pilot’s license.  Probably his greatest gift of wisdom was he could spot a phony.  He didn’t have a lot of time for you if you weren’t genuine.  Sassy and I benefited from his wise counsel.  I do want to also credit your great grandmother Marty (Mema).  They were a great team.  If you were to talk to her, I am pretty sure she will tell the source of her wisdom.  Read on!

    This leads me to the greatest source of wisdom, the Bible in general and the Book of Proverbs specifically.  By the time you are reading this, your next read should be the book of Proverbs.  As I child I heard many of these Proverbs and they probably were imbedded in heart.  As an adult, they became one of my greatest sources of Wisdom and I have read them many times.  Wisdom is addressed many times.  Here are a few of my favorites!

Proverbs 1 NASB To know wisdom and instruction, To discern the sayings of understanding, To receive instruction in wise behavior, Righteousness, justice, and integrity; To give prudence to the naive, To the youth knowledge and discretion, A wise person will hear and increase in learning, And a person of understanding will acquire wise counsel, To understand a proverb and a saying, The words of the wise and their riddles.  The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; Fools despise wisdom and instruction.

Proverbs 3:5,6 NASB Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 16:32 NASBOne who is slow to anger is better than the mighty,
And one who rules his spirit, than one who captures a city.

Proverbs 17:27-28 NASB ²⁷ One who withholds his words has knowledge,
And one who has a cool spirit is a person of understanding.
²⁸ Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise;
When he closes his lips, he is considered prudent.

Proverbs 22:6-8 NASB ⁶ Train up a child in the way he should go,
Even when he grows older he will not abandon it.
⁷ The rich rules over the poor, And the borrower becomes the lender’s slave.
⁸ One who sows injustice will reap disaster, And the rod of his fury will perish.

Proverbs 23:4 NASB ⁴ Do not weary yourself to gain wealth;
Stop dwelling on it.

Proverbs 24:33-34 NASB ³³ “A little sleep, a little slumber, A little folding of the hands to rest,”
³⁴ Then your poverty will come like a drifter, And your need like an armed man.

Proverbs 27:6 NASB ⁶ Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.

Proverbs 27:17 NASB ¹⁷ As iron sharpens iron, So one person sharpens another.

Proverbs 28:6 NASB ⁶ Better is a poor person who walks in his integrity,
Than a person who is crooked, though he is rich.

Proverbs 31:8-9 NASB ⁸ Open your mouth for the people who cannot speak,
For the rights of all the unfortunate. ⁹ Open your mouth, judge righteously,
And defend the rights of the poor and needy.

These are just a few of those.  There are 31 Proverbs.  Find a month with 31 days and read one a day.

To put it simply, almost everything I have written to this point has been influenced by my parents!  Quite often I have commented to friends if I didn’t have a fulfilled life it would be my fault and not parents!

Having said that, it is true my parents weren’t perfect.  At their core, however, they were good and always put my sister and my best interest first in their life!  There are things about our family which could have been different (I shared about one in an earlier note) and I tried to do a few things different from my parents.  Looking back I still know I owe them a great debt of gratitude for the person I am.  Let’s be honest, they do get some of the blame for some of my quirks and negative behavior over the years, though I have to own them as well.

Let me try to summarize some of the lessons I learned!

There was a lot of love in our family.  I knew I was loved.  Having this as a foundation built a lot of confidence and helped me not be overwhelmed by circumstances.

There was security.  We were fortunate my mother’s main job was our care giver and my father was the main provider.  It was a huge gift.  Both of them showed up for their jobs every day and worked overtime to be great parents.  Sassy and I probably shared those responsibilities a little more, but we both were fully invested as parents!

My mother had a funny sense of humor!  She taught me to laugh at myself more than to laugh at others.  It was probably the best lesson I learned.  My sense of humor came from her.  Mom was a bit of a tease.  Never cruel or cutting, but she was quick to make a joke.  When I wandered off in a store and would find her, she would often look at me and say “whose little boy are you!”  There was a brief moment I felt lost and abandoned, but she usually followed it with a big hug and big laugh.  Mom’s sense of humor was never vindictive or demeaning.  It was always gentle and a bit impish. There was a period in my life during college I regret how cutting and demeaning my sense of humor became.  After a few years I really got tired of myself and began to curb my tongue.   I am not sure if I really learned this from her, but I have tried to only tease people who are strong and I am pretty sure have a good self concept.  It’s no fun picking on those weaker than.  At mom’s best, she lit up a room with her outgoing personality.  I learned from her!  She helped me become comfortable in large social settings.  Though I was never the brightest light in the room, I wasn’t afraid to let my light shine when the opportunity presented itself.

My father was much more serious.  He didn’t make a lot of jokes.  I am not sure he even knew when things were funny.  Sometimes in social settings he was a bit awkward.  He did, however, have a great smile and though he never really lit up a room, one on one he was always showing interest in others.   He did not seek the lime light, but worked hard in the background to make sure mom and the family could shine!

When I was younger I acted more like mom.  Probably Mom’s sense of humor helped me as a pastor to be congenial and confident in crowds. Since I have retired and am older, I find myself gravitating toward being like Dad.  Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy making people laugh and am always looking for a good joke, but I do find myself enjoying one on one conversations outside the limelight a bit more!

Combined, the lessons they both taught was kindness.  It was expected!  It was modeled even more than taught.  I don’t think I ever heard my dad speak a critical or negative word about another person.  Mom on the other hand might make snarky comments about friends and family, but it was never demeaning or cruel.  She was a pretty good judge of character and she could spot a phony.  Though I was held to high standards and disciplined if I failed to meet them, they were never demeaning.  They were honest and frank.  They would listen to me.  If I needed discipline it really was for direction.  It wasn’t cruel or condescending.  It was honest and done with love.

A verse in the Bible which is a part of my Core Value is “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 NIV  My parents modeled this even more than they taught it.

Probably another lesson I learned from them was my work ethic.  When I was young, “immediate gratification” wasn’t a phrase I ever heard.  There were no fast food restaurants, no microwaves (though we thought individual frozen dinners aka TV dinners because you had your own choice and your own tree and you could eat them in front of the TV were pretty cool), no mobile communication, no social media.  While I have enjoyed those things, we were taught the best things in life take preparation.  They take time.  They require an investment.  I can’t even begin to imagine the fast pace world in which you will live.  My generation really embraced the story of Rabbit and the turtle.  I love to move at the speed  of the rabbit, but it is good to know the turtle option is available as well.

The Bible calls this perseverance.

 “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:1-3, 5 NIV

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4 NIV

The most important lesson my parents taught was a faith grounded in the Bible, God’s word.  Belief God created the world and God’s will was more important than mine has always guided me all my life.  My prayer is these notes will give you a few foot holds for your faith and will guide you in your life!

    Central to the faith of those who follow Jesus is the fact God loves humanity unconditionally and unselfishly. At the core is John 3:16 NASB 16 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. This is probably one of the first scriptures that I learned as a child, and I hope it will become a part of your life as well. As I grew in my faith, there were other scriptures which began to inform me!

John 15:16 NASB 16 You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you.

2 Thessalonians 2:13 NASB 13 But we should always give thanks to God for you, brothers and sisters beloved by the Lord, because God has chosen you [a]from the beginning for salvation through sanctification [c]by the Spirit and faith in the truth.

1 John 4:10-11 NIV This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. We love because he first loved us.

1 John 4:19 NIV We love because he first loved us.
It has been and still is a life long journey to become a person who loves unconditionally and lives a selfless life as Jesus did. One never reaches this destination, but the hope is each step takes us closer.

    The first step we all must make is to accept, embrace and enjoy the reality God loves each of us personally and it is not based on our ability to be loveable. God loves us! There is a lot for you to learn about God’s unconditional love!

    Though God loves us and forgives us, it is not a license to do whatever we want. These scriptures while telling us of God’s love for us, also express God’s hope and probably even an expectation we will love others unconditionally. Only God has the ability to love conditionally. God has a vision for us to love as He loves. It’s a great challenge!

    During your life you will have a lot of opportunities to practice unconditional love. There will be successes and there will be failure. Try to get to where your successes start to outnumber your failures.

    There will only be a small number of people in your life who will truly love you unconditionally. Even the best of friends will always have some demands and expectations you may or may not be able to achieve. Friends give us a lot of practice. When Sassy and I started our relationship which led to our marriage, I thought I was doing a fairly well loving her unconditionally. She is really quite easy to love, but unfortunately there are expectations each person brings to a relationship. How we negotiate those expectations will determine our ability to love unconditionally. It wasn’t until your mother was born, I really had to learn how to love unconditionally. As a parent, you want so much for your child. It hurts deeply when you can’t give them everything thing they want. It hurts even deeper when you might not even be able to give them what they need. Showing unconditional love when some needs discipline and direction is a great challenge. Frankly, being a father showed me how incapable of unconditional love I was. It was painful to fail. It was also painful when you did your best to show unconditional love and it still didn’t help a situation.

    Even with all of the challenges, being a father was the greatest experience of my life. Being stretched to give your child the things they want and need. Loving a child when they are struggling! Loving a child when they are disobedient! Loving a child when they don’t love you!

    Every situation taught me a little bit more about how God must feel as a loving Father.
This was the best and most challenging choice I made to be a father to your mother. I cherish the struggle and the successes we share. The pain and joy were all worth it.

    Being a grandfather is much easier. It is not my responsibility to discipline you, but I don’t intend to spoil you! If your parents say no, so do I! If there is something your parents would like for you, Sassy and I will do all in all power to help!

    At the time I was still in charge of your mother, I had a lot of other responsibilities. Though family came first in my life, my call as a pastor was very important as well and required a lot of time and energy. God entrusted me with a great church with a great vision and mission and I am grateful for the opportunity I had to serve.

    At this time of my life being your grandfather is probably my greatest responsibility. It is my greatest joy.

    One final word about how God loves us. People often comment we are all God’s children. That is only partly true. We are actually God’s creation. We were created out of the earth
(Genesis 27 Then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and the man became a living person). Only Jesus was God’s child. Jesus was God’s own flesh and blood. We come into God’s family through adoption. 1 John 3 NASB 3 See how great a love the Father has given us, that we would be called children of God. As the scripture states, we are called God’s Children. The decision is left to us whether we want to be a part of the family.

    It was a choice to love your mother. It was a choice for her to love us back. Your parents love you, and it will be your choice to love them back.

    So, it is with God! He loves you unconditionally, but the ball is in your court to love God back.

I am praying for you to know and respond to His unconditional love!

Gee Sprague, December 05, 2022