This is an interesting question and there are a lot of ways for me to write about it! One thing I have noticed is over the years I have seen emotional and physical characteristics of both of my parents appear , disappear and then reappear. Often, I have noticed the things I thought were unappealing about my parents appear in me. Fortunately, their strengths have benefited me more than their weaknesses, but observing their weaknesses has also helped me to grow to be a little more complete as I try to improve on my weaknesses. I am grateful both of my parents were loving and kind. Their lives were very instrumental in the person I am, warts and all!
From an early age, like most boys, I wanted to be just like my father. When asked what I wanted to do for a job I always responded, an Engineer. Your great grandfather was a highly skilled mechanical engineer who would gravitate towards aeronautical engineering, working most of his career with a major company designing defense systems for the military. He taught me a lot about how to use tools, to design and to build things. Even at an early age, I liked to take apart things and see if I could put them back together. I like to repair broken things. I like to take a tool or piece of equipment and see if I can find other uses or somehow tweak it a little to make it better. Because of this propensity, I did major in math in college. His mathematic and engineering mind definitely formed me.
My mother was very organized and smart, but her strongest areas were in her outgoing personality and her sense of humor. These areas were lacking in my father, but mom had it covered! Most of my emotional make up came from her. She loved music and encouraged me to sing and to play guitar. Though my dad didn’t discourage this, she was the one who inspired me to pursue the talents and desires of my heart!
Sometimes, during my life, I felt like I got all the annoying traits of both my parents and it felt like my sister got all of their great traits. As I have grown older, when I saw some of those traits, I took steps to not let them produce negative results and I have tried to concentrate on the strengths.
Overall, my parents were incredible influences in my life and I thank God for the gifts they gave me! Embracing their strengths and recognizing their weaknesses definitely influenced me and I am grateful for both!
Already, we notice characteristics that resemble your parents. We see their strengths and weaknesses in you and the effort they are making to influence you to become the person God created you to be!
This is an opportunity to share about your mother. By the time you are reading this, you probably know she is not our biological child, but our child by adoption. Nothing about your mother came from our gene pool!
Throughout her life, people would comment, “she has your eyes or she has her mother’s smile.” We never tried to inform people she was adopted. We would just smile at each other and think how amazing God was to give us a child who would actually grow to have some resemblance. Any physical resemblance to us is really just accidental. Some adopted children are from other cultures and may never have a physical resemblance to their parents. There are, however, some strong resemblances which go way beyond outward appearances.
Your mom and grandmother, share a love for entertaining, decorating, shopping, shoes, and a whole host of other things. Not exactly sure what traits she has of mine, probably determination and grit. These really are just our ability to be stubborn.
In our family, adoption is a very special thing. Our faith is formed around the New Testament and teachings of Jesus and His early followers describing how we are adopted into the family of God. People will often say we are children of God, but it is not totally accurate. We are actually creations of God, created in the image of God. Jesus, in a sense, is the only true biological child of God. The New Testament proclaims Jesus provides a way for each human to actually become a child of God. That method is through adoption.
John 15:16 NIV You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.
Romans 8:15 NRSV For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received a spirit of adoption. When we cry, “Abba! Father!”
Romans 8:22-23 NRSV We know that the whole creation has been groaning in labor pains until now; 23and not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly while we wait for adoption, the redemption of our bodies.
Galatians 4: 4-7 CEV But when the time was right, God sent his Son, and a woman gave birth to him. His Son obeyed the Law, 5 so he could set us free from the Law, and we could become God’s children. 6 Now that we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts. And his Spirit tells us that God is our Father. 7You are no longer slaves. You are God’s children, and you will be given what he has promised.
Ephesians 1:4-6 CEV 4Before the world was created, God had Christ choose us to live with him and to be his holy and innocent and loving people. 5God was kind and decided that Christ would choose us to be God’s own adopted children. 6God treated us with undeserved grace because of the Son he dearly loves, and so we should praise God.
1 John 3:1 NIV See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.
Each of these scriptures describes how we were chosen by God to be His child. Just as your mother has taken on traits of her mother and father, as an adopted child of God, we begin to grow into the likeness of Jesus, the only true child of God. Through adoption, we become a part of God’s family. It is quite a gift.
When you were baptized as infant, it was the first step in God’s adoption process to bring you into Jesus’ family. At some point in your life, you will have to make a decision whether you want to accept or reject God’s adoption. It is your choice. If you accept your place in Jesus’ family, you will grow and start to take on the family characteristics. Some will come naturally. Some won’t. At the very core of this is it is a gift. You didn’t earn a spot or deserve a spot in Jesus’ family. Jesus died for you to have. Even when you stray from the family tree, Jesus will not leave you or forsake you! You are family!
So, I am not sure I really answered the question. What is important, we are formed by our family! Who we become is a product of who loves us and who we love. Jesus loves us more than we can even imagine. My prayer for you is to grow into His likeness!